I pulled into the garage. I got out of my car. I came in the house. Next time I needed to go somewhere I have no idea where my keys and/or purse are.
I am at my desk working. I look down and see two empty boxes of Wheat Thins and have no clue where they went.
In my attempt to welcome beauty into my life, I recognize a need for consciously becoming a part of my own life again. There are so many things that I do without even thinking or realizing it.
I don't know where my mind (or spirit) goes, but I do know that I am not consciously present much of the time. How else does my house seemingly fall into disarray around me unless I feel I am so undeserving of a beautiful home that I must sabotage it, and disappear in shame when my sabotage succeeds?
The belief that "I'm just lazy" no longer serves me. If I am consciously aware of my body at all times, I will know where I put my keys...or better yet, I will be aware that they are in my hand and I need to put them on the hook. It really isn't a matter of laziness, because I walk by the hook with the keys in my hand to turn off the alarm. I'm right there, but for some inexplicable reason I am unconscious of my keys.
Living consciously is exhausting. Deliberately reminding myself to breathe deep and really feel my physical presence is a strange habit to be fostering. Until I started making myself be aware of it, I hadn't realized how often I all but stop breathing during the day.
For now, I still anticipate losing my keys on a regular basis, and hunting for the remote that is still in my hand. The best I can do is work towards the goal of being fully aware of my body at all times. Small steps, right?
The more I become aware of my own physical presence, the more straightforward it will be to allow and retain beauty in my life. I can only imagine the amount of deserved beauty and bounty awaiting discovery through heightened awareness!
I deserve BEAUTY in my life!
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