Buy Yourself Some Flowers

I was telling a friend that I was in a funk.  I was in a general "I really don't want to" funk about taking care of myself, my home, and my responsibilities in general.  He said, "I don't know quite how to say this.  Go buy yourself some flowers."  I just laughed and went on from there.  A few hours later it started replaying in my mind, and I've been thinking about it for a while.

Flowers are the classic epitome of beauty.  They are beautiful without trying.  Nobody can argue against flowers being a beautiful thing.  If I buy myself a big bouquet, I will be giving myself some very tangible beauty that I so deserve.  I will be adding beauty to my home in a very organic, unforced way.

I have decided I like cut flowers better than potted flowers.  When the cut flowers eventually fade and die, I know for a fact that I didn't kill them.  Also, they are an excellent exercise for me in accepting the impermanence of some forms of beauty.  They are there to bring me joy for a while, then they fade into a pleasant memory.

My most recent bouquet is a combination of red, pink and white carnations.  They have this wonderful fresh smell, and they have a certain stalwart quality to them.  It really brings me pleasure to place them at the center of the kitchen table after I have scrubbed and swept for the evening.  I handle them every day and they make me smile.  My children ask every day to be allowed to touch them and to sniff them.

Part of me wants flowers to be purchased for me.  I will never turn them down as a gift.  But I am realizing that the act of purchasing them for myself causes me to look at them differently.  The only energy or intention imbued within the bouquet is what has been placed there by me.  I deserve them, and have therefore provided them for myself.  They are a thoroughly selfish act of beauty and love which I entirely deserve.  From now on I intend to furnish my home with fresh flowers on a regular basis.

I deserve BEAUTY in my life!